What To Do If Love Isn’t In the Air This Valentine’s Day?
~ by Tera Warner
There’s no escaping it now. I watched the Cupid-inspired kitsch practically hit the shelves the day after Christmas! Candy hearts, stacks of assorted chocolates and a whole section of reds and pinks exploded in the greeting card aisle of my local pharmacy. With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, “love is in the air” whether you happen to be feeling it or not. For those who are not, this time of year can leave a person feeling kinda prickly. Today’s article offers some suggestions for what to do about it.
When You’ve Lost That “Loving Feeling”
Hallmark, candy stores and florists everywhere are delighted to spread the message of Valentine’s Day, but for anyone struggling in their intimate relationships who feels they’ve lost that “loving feeling,” February 14th can put tensions at an all time high!
If, in your romantic relationship, you:
- feel like nothing you say makes any difference anymore
- are tired of not being understood no matter how hard you try
- long for a deeper connection, but you just seem to be drifting further apart
- keep butting your heads and arguing over little things with the one you’re supposed to love the most in life
- aren’t so sure you’ve got what it takes to keep it all together
Then I give you permission to ban completely all kitschy pink paraphernalia. Boycott all heart-speckled Hallmark cards and you can even go tell Cupid to stick his arrow where the sun doesn’t shine! But, the one thing you can’t do when it comes to love, is give up hope that you can restore it and have more of it in your life than you ever thought was possible.
Why Are Relationships So Hard?
The pressures of work, money, health and so many social relationships, all sitting in a pool of our past failures and frustrations, makes it impossible not to bump heads and get discouraged in love once in a while.
I should know. I spent years falling on my face in love and had more slobbering sob sessions and bleeding heart breakups I could write a book about what NOT to do. (In fact, I have, and I’ll get to that in a moment. ;-)) But the one thing I had going for me in spite of my failures was that no matter how many times I fell or failed or sat flabbergasted by another failed relationship, I never stopped believing that love was possible and I refused all invitations to beat myself up for what I had done wrong.
I just got back up, and kept on going. I kept on risking and hoping and believing it would turn out. I told myself, “Tera, it’s better you err on believing too much, communicating too much, trying too much, than live without hope and lose your dream.”
Failure Can Be a Great Teacher
Then one day without warning, through an impossibly perfect series of serendipitous events, I walked right into Prince Charming himself. I tell the whole story here, if you’d like to read it. At 3 years old I knew I wanted to find “happily ever after,” but I spent the next 35 years in confusion, stumbling and failing and falling on my face in love before it finally happened!
The good news is, it wasn’t wasted! Having expertly failed at relationships for so many years, I took notes along the way. I paid attention to the things I’d missed. I started to recognize that intuitive nudge I had been ignoring and started to identify my patterns. As I did that, I got clearer and more confident and finally started to believe in myself.
Can I Still Have True Love?
No matter where your love relationship situation is at now, it’s totally possible to rekindle the flames. Even when you’re just working with dying embers, you can restore a vibrant, playful, loving connection with your intimate partner. Or, if you’ve recently lost one, you can finally figure out what it takes to find true love AND KEEP IT!
But you don’t need to take 35 years to figure it out. In fact, I put the best of what I’ve learned in a “Crash Course on How to Create a Thriving Romantic Relationship.” I’ve taken just the most vital data–the things you really need to know and do–and put it into a 3-Part Power Course. You can learn all about it here.
Don’t wait for another pile of tear-soaked tissues to shake you out of your frustrations in love and intimacy. Get on board this program that kicks off on February 21st. If you’ve lost that “loving feeling,” this is how you can find it. Restore your confidence in yourself, your trust in life and in love and let’s show Cupid whose boss.