[New Year, New You] Day 18: How to Find More Love When You Need it
If it’s true that problems have solutions, that the difficulties in our relationships and personal situations can be solved, then we owe it to ourselves, and to life, to maintain a certain degree of interest and commitment directed toward the resolution of our problems, especially with other people.
It appears that the firecracker part of life is trying to improve, to produce and contribute in order to rise above the noise and that where life is stuck or struggling, there is more likely a heavy burden of confusion and overwhelm than there is the possibility that there are any “bad people.”
Where life flows easily and smoothly, there’s is understanding and a high degree of admiration–a sense of closeness to others, to your environment. Where there is struggle and sickness and strife, life gets stuck and we are far better investigating what we may not fully understand with the hope of finding some information that helps us get perspective, rather than risk kicking already overwhelmed people further down the chute of life.
Easier said than done, though, so this blog post should help you out a bit!
Love Comes From Understanding
Understanding is the foundation of love. Your ability to fully love the people, situations, subjects and areas of your life which currently may overwhelm, intimidate, frustrate, disappoint or annoy you depends entirely upon your willingness to understand them.
That’s a big, hard pill to swallow, but your ability to fully love ANY people, situations, subjects and areas of your life depends entirely on your willingness to understand them. Here’s a quote from one of my favorite books, The Art of Communicating by Zen Master, Thich Nhat Hanh:
“The foundation of love is understanding, and that means first of all understanding suffering. Each of us is hungry for understanding. If you really want to love someone and make him or her happy, you have to understand that person’s suffering. With understanding, your love will deepen and become true love.
“Compassion and love are born from understanding. How can you love unless you understand? How can the father love his son if he doesn’t understand the suffering and difficulties of his son? How can someone make his beloved happy without knowing anything about that person’s suffering and difficulties?
“If you want to make someone happy, you should ask yourself the question, ‘Do I understand him enough?’ ‘Do I understand her enough?’”